woof.

[miss-chance.livejournal.com]

Dear Neighbor Across the Bike Path,

I think you should know that I am an avowed pacifist, and a lover of animals and humanity.

This means that if your dog barks for an hour straight between 8 and 9am next Sunday, too, I will not come over there and strangle it. Even if I've been out at work until 1am the night before, again.

It is possible, however, that someday I will snap.

If this were to happen, I would feel great sadness and remorse, and my sleep would be wracked with guilt. But at least it would not be interrupted by your dog all morning.

with all the love and compassion I can muster after listening to your effing dog bark for an hour,


-Your Neighbor

Comments

[anotherjen.livejournal.com]

Isn't there some kind of ordinance against that? I mean the dog barking, not your strangling it. Definitely an ordinance against that.

[miss-chance.livejournal.com]

probably. But my ability to do anything like handle a telephone when oscillating in and out of liminal sleep, is pretty much nil. Chances are I couldn't actually strangle anything in that state, either, so I guess everyone is safe.

[rmd.livejournal.com]

bark bark BARK BARK BARK bark bark

bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark BARK BARK Bark baRK bark bark bArK bark BaRK bark bark BArk bark bark bark arrooooooo bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark.

[benndragon.livejournal.com]

Oh good, someone who speaks dog and understands English! If you could explain that barking loudly before noon for long periods is a Bad Doggy move, the problem would be solved.

[dial-zero.livejournal.com]

Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!! Hey!! Hey! Hey! Hey! HEY! HEY HEY HEY HEY!! hey! hey! hey! hey hey! hey!

[smammy]

I'm a dog. I'm a dog. I'm a dog. I'm a dog. I'm a dog. I'm a dog. I'm a dog. I'm a dog. I'm a dog. I'm a dog. I'm a dog. I'm a dog. I'm a dog. I'm a dog. I'm a dog. I'm a dog. I'm a dog. I'm a dog. I am a dog! I'm a dog. I'm a dog. I'm a dog. I'm a dog.

[dial-zero.livejournal.com]

:D hehehe.

[ron_newman]

(don't go looking for it now -- Somerville took all these signs down after changing the law to allow leashed dogs in parks)

[rmd.livejournal.com]

That's wonderful. I like a trace of whimsy in my public works signage.

[karenjulip.livejournal.com]

Isn't a more direct approach to talk to your neighbor, and if that doesn't work then to call the police about it at some point in the day when you're more awake? Or do you not want a solution, just sympathy from this community?

[ron_newman]

I agree - your neighbor may not read LJ and see this, so you should talk to him/her directly.

[enveri.livejournal.com]

Thirded. If you're allergic to confrontation (Heaven knows, I am!) a note on the door would work. They may not be home, so thusly unaware of doggy's poor manners.

[ron_newman]

though I'd leave out some of the stuff in the LJ-posted version of the note.

[perspicuity.livejournal.com]

perhaps you would be surprised at just how vehemently someone will deny that THEIR dog (or child) has bad manners, and barks. even with a video of the dog barking for 3 days straight... "my dog never does that, go away, or i'm calling the police". hard to prove, harder to get anything done about it. especially if it's not the dog's fault but the owner's. oh well.

but yes, sympathies. i have very loud neighbor's this season. i hope they move soon :)

#

[miss-chance.livejournal.com]

Eh. I was mostly looking for sympathy. In the same way one might say "damn! look at all that rain!"

I don't actually know which neighbor it is. From my window over the bike path there are at least a dozen houses, where the dog could have been, each of which have several apartments. So to approach the problem directly would have required getting out of bed, getting dressed, going out and walking up and down the bike path to find the dog, then walking around to the front of the street and finding the house again, then ringing all the doorbells. And maybe they put their dog out when they left for the morning... etc.

so yeah, this is just one of those times when someone says "Arrg! Frustrating thing!" and is not actually looking for a solution, just "yarg! I hear your frustration." I feel that this in not an unprecedented use of social media.

[koloratur.livejournal.com]

I am sympathetic! Barky dogs on two sides of my house this spring...ugh.

[808.livejournal.com]

how can you hear the dog over the airplanes?

[irishlibrarian.livejournal.com]

this wins

[miss-chance.livejournal.com]

I'm pretty sure the dog was under the airplanes.

[808.livejournal.com]

Good idea. They can wait until a GroupOn is posted to DSLJ and then go together and get a discount.

[ron_newman]

just watch out for all those sidewalk bicyclists

[greenlily.livejournal.com]

Ack. That is truly unfortunate. Maybe the barking dog is like my parents' late dog, who was so stupid that he'd start barking and then forget to stop. Long after whatever it was he was barking at was gone, he was still stuck in an Infinite Bark Loop. :(

[mamajoan.livejournal.com]

I feel your pain. Seven years we've lived in our house now and the neighbors' dog still barks his stupid head off every time we go in our back yard. *grumble*

[on-reserve.livejournal.com]

We have neighbors with beagles. Loud, barking, baying beagles. The owners never walk them. They open the door and let them out (ignoring the fact that the dogs have been home alone all day and are, yanno, social animals). We have spoken to them about it; we have called animal control. (We are in Medford, btw) Finally, this weekend, we bought this:
PetSafe Outdoor Ultrasonic Bark Deterrent (http://www.amazon.com/PetSafe-Outdoor-Ultrasonic-Bark-Deterrent/dp/B000UZNLGA/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1303825884&sr=8-1)

It work LIKE A CHARM. Significantly reduced the barking and baying. Now, if manufacturers only made products for people playing drums with all the window open at 11pm and for the pack of dudebros who listen to sports radio at top volume and then talk loudly over the sound of the radio, also at 11pm.

[lafriperie.livejournal.com]

just had to pipe up with a word of warning about these. my landlady got one for her barky dogs and it worked somewhat, but not really. however, it totally traumatized my dog, who rarely barks. basically, every time another dog barked, my dog would get punished, and she started freaking out, running outside and refusing to come back in the house, shaking uncontrollably, etc. i was about to take her to the vet until we figured out what it was. so if you use one, make sure there aren't any sensitive dogs around who are paying the price!