What good's a protest without a song?

[spatch]

There've been many songs written about the eternal triangle. This one tells the story of a Mr Jonmon, a LiveJournal community and a moderatin' man named Ron Newman. When the sun rises tomorrow, Ron Newman... will be served.

Hang down your head, Ron Newman
Hang down your head and brood
Hang down your head, Ron Newman
Oh boy, we've all been sued.

We read it on the LJ
This Jonmon had been bad
Read it on the LJ
And there we laughed like mad.

Hang down your head, Ron Newman
Hang down your head and brood
Hang down your head, Ron Newman
Who knew this was a feud?

We forgot about it all, then
We let three whole years pass
We got on with our lives, then
We're put on by this ass.

Hang down your head, Ron Newman
The one who was least rude
Hang down your head, Ron Newman
Yet he thinks you're the dude.

Trouble, oh there's trouble
For all Does, Jane and John
He sent us all nice letters
Some found him on their lawn.

Hang down your head, Ron Newman
Hang down your head subdued
Hang down your head, Ron Newman
Oh boy, we've all been sued.

This time tomorrow
Reckon where we'll be
Prob'ly banding together
As one weird family.

Keep your head up, Ron Newman
Keep your head up this time
Keep your head up, Ron Newman
Jonmon won't see a dime.

PS THIS IS ALL TOTALLY COPYRIGHT ME WHICH MEANS YOU CAN'T COPY IT OR POST IT OR REPOST IT OR PROBABLY EVEN LOOK AT IT WITHOUT MY CONSENT, BECAUSE THAT WOULD BE AN INVASION OF PRIVACY AND PRIVACY IS VERY IMPORTANT WHEN IT'S MY OWN.

Comments

[ratatosk.livejournal.com]

Wow!

My only comment to the original thread three years ago was that it would all be better as a musical, which for some reason did not get me sued. I have, however, been reminding people of this fact, including derspatchel. I'd like to say at least someone listened to me, but I'll hold out for a big opening number.

[hahathor.livejournal.com]

I made a mix CD in his honor (http://zenrunningorder.org/index.php?option=com_zeromix&task=ViewMix&Itemid=9&mixID=1666"). Surprisingly, I haven't received a letter from his lawyer. Perhaps because the mix write-up doesn't mention him by name (though it does point to the news article that started all this).

[tikva.livejournal.com]

That's a pretty brilliant mix CD. Well done!

[hahathor.livejournal.com]

Given your (awesome) icon, you might also enjoy this mix (http://www.artofthemix.org/FindAMix/getcontents2.aspx?strMixID=107960).

[greenlily.livejournal.com]

Oh...my. *does the cat thing with tilting the head and blinking*

I'm about to lose a whole lot of time to this web site, aren't I.

(oh, and the mix is brilliant.)

[hahathor.livejournal.com]

Sadly the site is no longer active. It started getting hacked with viruses, and the folks running it (who were doing it as a labor of love) decided it wasn't worth the effort of keeping it clean. I traded a LOT of mixes with folks while it was going, and made a lot of friends (a fair number of whom I've met in person while traveling) there. I got turned on to an insane amount of good music. I probably should put some of my better mixes up on MixCloud.

[imsorrysondheim.livejournal.com]

You asked for an opening number? I'm happy to oblige :-)

(With thanks to my beta reader who has asked to remain anonymous)

Attend the tale of Johnny Mon
His hair was lank and his skin was wan.
He chilled the discourse of young women
Who never thereafter were heard of again
He's drawn the ire that few have drawn
Did Johnny Mon
The demon stalker of Elm Street

He kept a wheel in Porter Square
A lure of little artistic flair.
His feelings were hurt; the Does were lewd
They went to the courthouse haphazardly sued
By Johnny
By Johnny Mon
The Demon Stalker of Elm Street

Cast your lawsuits wide
Johnny. You will win no prize
All the Does you will depose ignore your cries

His needs were few, he had no room
To sleep on a sofa was his doom.
A house of kink and a startup game,
A vampire, a matchup, all this to his shame.
In malice he went after Ron
did Johnny Mon
The Demon Stalker of Elm Street

Adversarial Johnny was
Vulgar and vicious and vile 'e was
Back of his smile under his word
Johnny heard music that nobody heard
Johnny strutted and Johnny spammed
Half-baked letters our Johnny spammed
Johnny was proud, Johnny was pervy
Johnny would blink and rats would scurry

Attend the tale of Johnny Mon
He served them papers but he was wrong
What happened then has copyright
And he wouldn't want us bring it to light
Not Johnny
Not Johnny Mon
The Demon Stalker of Elm Street

[jducoeur]

Bravo!

[greenlily.livejournal.com]

Oooo. Besides being awesome, this version is easier to sing--for the high sopranos, at least. ('SWEEEEEENEEEEEEE' on a high C or whatever it is is no one's favorite thing.) Brav@.